Loving Your Lover
by 4869HOLMES
Summary: The title totally sucks. I know, I know. I have no clue what else to name it... Hiroki receives a lover letter. How will Nowaki react to this? Find Out. Please R&R THIS IS YAOI! KNOW WHAT YOU ARE IN FOR! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED! NO LIKE NO READ!


**Junjou Egoist – Knowing What's in Your Heart**

_I don't own anything (although it is be my wish to claim all copyrights on the series)_

Kamijou Hiroki stared at the huge pile of work his students handed in, he felt like he was going to puke. He knew he had to give half the class a failing grade. It was not his fault, students these days just weren't taking literature seriously enough.

He had only gotten through one fourth of the pile and there was only one passing mark in the class. He frowned thinking the future of Japan was going to be trusted in the hands of people who couldn't even write a simple essay.

The bell rung, causing him to jump in his seat, was it already time to go home already? It felt as if he had only sat down, but two hours have passed since the end of his classes. Hiroki stood up gathered his papers, stuffing them into his bag and was ready to dash out the door. Instead, he was interrupted by the knocking sounds that came from the other side instead.

He opened the door to see a girl standing there. Althoguh her bangs almost covered her entire face, Hiroki could still tell her face was bright red. He didn't remember who the girl was, but he did vaguely recall having someone like her in one of his classes.

"A-ano, Kamijou-sensei, my name is Sayano Ayumi…" the girl's voice trailed off, in an inaudible tone.

Hiroki now realized who this female student was. She was from his first period class literature class. Unlike the bunch of idiots that sat in the first row and still managed to fall asleep, this girl sat at the back of the classroom, paying attention to everything he taught. Occasionally, she asked questions that Hiroki himself couldn't give a full answer to. She was also one of the few students that cared enough to get a decent grade it the course too.

"Yes, Sayano-san. Is there something I can help you with?" This seemed to have made the girl even more uncomfortable than she already was. The color on her face darkened, her ears turned red, she fidgeted with her fingers. As if she was trying to gather up her courage before talking. Hiroki could tell that she was not able to say whatever it is she had planned.

The girl was obviously shy, but Hiroki wondered where she had gathered up the courage to speak up in class, with all those idiots staring at her. She reached into her bag and pulled out a pink envelope and gave it to him.

"Here, Kamijou-sensei, please read this." When she finished saying the sentence, she dashed down the hall way.

Hiroki stood there blankly, staring down the empty hallway wondering what the girl had wanted to say to him. He held the envelope and stared blankly at the piece of paper.

"A first love letter." A deeper voice came from above him. Lifting his head he could see Miyagi staring at him with a smirk on his face. "My, my, what will this do to your fragile relationship?"

"Kyoujuu, don't you have a class right now? And how can you be certain that this a love letter." He responded with an automatic answer trying to keep his cool like the way he always wanted, but failing at the attempt.

"My class ended sooner than I expected, so I let my students out early." Miyagi said with a composed expression as he walked into the messy office where the two of them work. He sat down on one of the small brown couches in the middle of the untidy room.

"Kamijou, you look depressed these days." The older man paused for a while studying the young man's face. He realized the problem immediately. "Na, Kamijou. You know it wouldn't hurt you to try to be romantic and caring once in a while. When was the time you and your lover spent the night together. With him working irregular hours at the hospital and you stuck here all day, it is a wonder how you guys still manage to stay together."

Hiroki knew the nosy professor was right, he had been seeing less and less of Nowaki these days. Sometimes he even wonders if their relationship is a healthy one. He was deep in thought, and gave a jump as Miyagi light gave him a tap in the head with a book and said, "Go home today, you're done all you classes right? Take the rest of the work and mark them at home. And one more thing, try to be nice and drop your stubborn act once in a while. It's not healthy, nor do you do a good of shielding yourself from others."

His pride told him to argue with the professor and deny everything he just said, but his heart knew what Miyagi said was right. He really missed Nowaki. So he might as well take this chance and go home.

He quickly mumbled "Thanks Kyoujuu." Then left the building university building wondering where Nowaki was.

--

Hiroki rammed him hand into his pockets and grabbed his keys. He was nervous after not seeing Nowaki for a long time. He only felt this way with Nowaki, thinking about him made his heart pound, flushed cheeks and it made Nowaki the center of his world. His hand trembled as they tried to fit the key into key hole.

_What is wrong with me, I am 29 years old man and I am nervous to meet a man four years my junior?! _

He took a deep breath and inserted the key into the socket. Just as he was about to turned the key he heard a loud tumbling noise inside his apartment. He froze, a moment later the lock turned. A taller man who opened the door looked at him who stood in the door way. A huge goofy grin appeared on his face, "Hiro-san, welcome home."

Hiroki immediately flush a light red, he was never able to keep his calm composed face around this person.

"Idiot, what were you doing? And what was that noise?" He asked as he made his way into the apartment and shut the door behind him.

"Ah, I just got home from a long shift at the hospital and was kind of tired. But then I heard the key in the door and thought that it was Hiro-san. When I got up I knocked over the chair I was sitting on." He admitted in a carefree tone. "Umm… Hiro-san, aren't you home a bit early today?"

"I brought the rest of my work home. It's just marking anyways, I wanted to get a change of environment" Hiroki answered in a shaky tone, he knew it wasn't enough of an excuse, but that was all he could some up with on the spot. He didn't want Nowaki finding out about the letter.

Nowaki looked the man he loved and was happy that they could spend the rest of the day by themselves. Then, he noticed the pink envelope in his lover's hand and jumped to the obvious conclusion. His expression turned from a cheerful grin to a curious face almost instantly. "Um… Hiro-san what is that in your hand."

Hiroki looked down and realized he was still holding the love letter his student gave him. It had completely slipped his mind that he was still holding such a thing. He then realized what Nowaki must have thought, and got hurt over it. He didn't know what to do, his face turned into a deeper red. "Ah, it's nothing you should be concerned with." He quickly said out of desperation to avoid the unnecessary topic.

"Hiro-san, it does concern me that you are writing love letters to other men." Nowaki mumbled with a sullen expression that dominated his face.

Hiroki replied with a nervous tone, "Idiot, it is not something I wrote. I would never do something like this."

"Then may I see the letter." Nowaki asked, now filled with more curiosity than before.

"No"

"Why not, you just said you didn't write it, so why is it that I am not allowed to read it."

If it was possible Hiroki got more nervous than before, he did. "Why do you want to look at it? It has nothing to do with you."

"Because I loved you" Nowaki responded the obvious.

Hiroki's flush deepened again. He had forgotten how easily the man could say such embarrassing words, and how direct he is. He saw the bedroom door and planned to make an escape. He gave another glance at the door, and dashed.

Hiroki felt a large hand grab his wrist and pull him backwards with a forceful tug. He lost his balance, fell backwards and landed right in Nowaki's embrace.

"Hiro-san are you not happy with, are you not satisfied with me and hiding things from me?" Hiroki could fell stab of pain from those words, he turned his head and saw the painful expression his lover wore.

Nowaki ran his hand through Hiroki's light brown hair and lifted his head closer to himself. Nowaki pressed his lips gently onto the smaller man's. Nowaki forced his lover's mouth open, invading him with a rough kiss.

Hiroki tried to push the larger man trying to explain everything to him. How the letter was not written by him, but given to him by a girl from one of his classes, and how he was going to reject the girl the next day. But, the harder he pushed the tighter Nowaki's grip became. He couldn't escape, his head spun with the shortage of breath, he could feel the waves of pain coming from Nowaki. _No, this isn't what I want. _Hiroki gathered his strength, and pushed once more at the large man. To his surprise Nowaki let go. They both panted, trying to get a hold on their breaths.

They stood there across the room, silence filled the room. Hiroki knew he needed to explain things to Nowaki. He was embarrassed and nervous, but he had no choice. He faced the floor and murmured, "I did not write this letter. It was given to me from a girl in my class, I was going to reject her, but she ran away before I could say anything. The letter is embarrassing, I didn't even open it yet you can read it if you want." Hiroki could feel the temperature in his face raise as he explained things.

The silence continued. Hiroki didn't know what to do. Nowaki stood there trying to process the words he had just heard. Then another more lustful whisper came from his lips. "Nowaki I'm cold."

Nowaki finally realized what Hiroki had just said. He ran up to the older man and took him within his embrace once more and kissed him. It was their usual kiss, Hiroki groaned as Nowaki explored every inch of his mouth, teasing his most sensitive places.

Nowaki's hands scooped Hiroki up and carried him into their bedroom. Nowaki gently put Hiroki onto the bed and mounted him with a smirk on his usually goofy face. He loosened Hiroki's tie and began to unbutton the button to his shirt.

"Idiot, I thought you said you were tried from the long shift at the hospital." Hiroki immediately said.

"I was, but now I'm interested in other things." Nowaki responded bashfully. Hiroki blushed but said nothing else to protest. It had been too long since they enjoyed each other's physical company.

Hiroki's chest was fully exposed when Nowaki finished unbuttoning his shirt. Nowaki stood there looking down at his lover, staring at the bare chest of the man that lay before him. "Hiro-san you're beautiful."

Hiroki was more embarrassed at the comment than by Nowaki stripping him. "Idiot, how can a man be beautiful."

"But Hiro-san is beautiful." Nowaki pressed his lips onto Hiroki's neck and left a trail of kisses as he made his way down the smaller man's chest, nibbling at the skin. Hiroki gave a light moan as his lover bit him.

Nowaki's hand moved southward and began unbuttoning the button his lover's pants, then unzipping the zipper. Hiroki was already excited from his lover's foreplay.

"Ah-" Hiroki squeezed his eyes shut as one of Nowaki's hand cupped around his hardened member and the other began fondling his nipple, sending waves of pleasure up and down his spine. Nowaki took the hardened cock in his hand. He pressed onto his lips for a light kiss, then taking the entire length in his mouth, sucking on his beloved Hiro-san trying to please the other man. Hiroki twitched and squirmed as the sensation hit him.

Hiroki tried to hold back as much as he possibly can, but when Nowaki bit down on his head. He lost control. "Nowaki let go. I'm-" he felt himself explode in his lover's mouth. Nowaki swallowed, then looked up at his lover who wore an embarrassing expression on his face. Nowaki leaned in closed and gave him a passionate kiss. Hiroki moan into the kiss. He never like the way Nowaki always swallowed and he dislike kissing him more after doing so. He would rather taste Nowaki then taste himself.

"Hmm," Hiroki broke the kiss as a finger inserted into his tight opening with no warning. Nowaki smiled at the moisture already produced inside his lover. He pushed the finger inwards turning and stretching the muscles inside. He soon added another finger into the tight opening, then another. Hiroki, who was so lost in the excitement, groaned as felt the removal of the fingers.

Nowaki position himself and quickly thrust in as he knew his Hiro-san did not like to wait. Hiroki cried at the intrusion. Nowaki waited for his lover to adjust to the intrusion.

"Nowaki hurry." That was the signal for the doctor to proceed. He began thrusting deep into his lover at a quick paste. Hitting Hiroki's prostate over and over again.

Hiroki cried loudly as the huge rod of his lover dug deep into him over and over, again and again.

"Nowaki, I'm com-"

"Hiro-san me to-"

Hiroki moaned and shot his semen all over the white sheets, while feeling the seed of his lover filling him up inside.

--

The bell rang, signaling the end of another day at Mitsuhashi University. As the bunch of tired looking students walked out of the door, Hiroki called out the girl who walked pass by him, the girl who gave him the letter the pervious day. "Sayano-san"

Hiroki was about the reject the girl when, "A-ano Kamijou-sensei, please forget about what happened yesterday. I know that sensei is a very devoted teacher and probably don't have time for a silly girl like me…" Her voice trembled then trailed off, her ears were bright red. Hiroki could tell the girl was embarrassed and was having a hard time forcing words out of her mouth.

"Sayano-san, please, calm down." He waited for his student to look him in the face. He stood there for a while. "You're right. I can't return those feelings you have for me. It's because you are too young, and we have a teacher and student relationship. However, please continue to work hard in the future."

Ayumi walked towards the door, she turned back and smiled, "Sensei, thank you." Then left the classroom and disappeared into the hallway swarming with students.

Hiroki got up when the last student left the classroom. Leaving the place deserted. Heading towards the literature office, thinking about the one person he could never forget.

**A/N: **XD! This is the re-edited version some small details are changed, and I tried my best to catch anything that did not make a lot of since including changing the title to something a little less cliché. Anyways I hoped you enjoyed reading it and please review. I welcome all comments… .


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